You guys, I have the coolest husband ever. Surprisingly, he’s a total preppy. He wears khakis and button downs. He’s an accountant and an Eagle Scout. I’m a savvy girl, and when I found the smartest and nicest guy that I had ever met, I married him. Go, me!
So I’m out shopping one day and I see these wild zebra print satin sheets. They just scream pimpalicious. I buy them and, snickering, put them on the bed. When hubby pulls back the covers, he’ll be so shocked that his perfectly organized mind will break!
He doesn’t let me down. When he leaps into bed, I’m rewarded by a surprised shout and “Whaaaaaaat?” eyebrows. I can’t stop laughing. Take that, you sexy geek.
Except that satin sheets are a real pain to sleep on, and I’m a feisty sleeper to begin with. Our pillows keep sliding off the bed. I take a good swing in my sleep and slide onto the floor, taking all of the bedding with me. It’s been a real pain, actually. A big, zebra-striped pain in the butt.
But was it worth it? Oh yes.
Slip’n’Slide sheets! At least you don’t have tile floors…
Egads! I’d have to put the shark on the floor in order to have something soft to land on!
Haha! HATE satin sheets! I do admit that when I read them as part of an “oh, so sexy, zomg head going to explode” sex scene I start giggling. Honestly, those things are dangerous! Wahoo for awesome prank. 🙂
See?! That’s exactly what happened, Kimberly! I was led astray by the media! 😉
The satin wasn’t so bad if I was sleeping in flannel or chain mail, but it’s too hot for either of those options here in Vegas.
Satin sheets remind me of college – circa 1988. Like you I bought a set trying to impress my then boyfriend (ended up marrying the dude and we’re still together…23 years baby) and it was hilarious. It is physically impossible to do anything on satin sheets…most of all sleep.
Yep, now that I’m old and fuddy-duddy (LOL!), I like my nice, soft, PRACTICAL sheets. 🙂
Ha! Cute, M!
Now I have this awesome image in my head of you sliding out of bed and onto the floor around 3 am, with all the pillows landing on top of you. Thanks for that!
KM: We put our kids in their most slippery pajamas and let them play on the sheets. They think it’s the best! 😛
Jami: You? A fuddy duddy? I don’t believe it for a second. We are just smart women who enjoy quality of sleep!
Lee: Yeah, it would be cuter if it was happening to someone else. 😉
Simon: And I wake up on the floor mad as a hornet. Let this image sustain you through your dark times.
I wonder if they do zebra print in cotton.
Funny as hell, HA!
LOL! I will not own satin sheets for the very reason you describe. I don’t want to end up on the floor!
Plus they just get too hot!
And they make a person’s hair go funny – hate that feeling.
Hi, I just popped in for the bad news blogfest. Am glad I did, these zebra sheets are fab! 🙂
hmmm very naughty and quirky!
Found you through Francine’s Bad News blogfest. Very funny, I can see the slipping and sliding in my head.
N. R. Williams, fantasy author
Please don’t take this in a bad way, but my mom would so buy those sheets. Matter of fact, she has a yellow and black zebra printed comforter on her bed right now. I don’t know what her obsession is with it. She’s usually not that weird.